HURDLES...

"Have you ever stayed up all night, worried that you've offended someone"? - Martin Kihn, A$$hole

I'm sitting here typing this from the comfort of my sofa....I am not in Benfield, and i am not lifting heavy things.

I suck

I'm doing my very best to step up to this challenge.
I'm attempting to find that warrior spirit that motivates people to push themselves out of their comfort zone and do something extraordinary.
I had a bit of a breakthrough on Monday night. I trained harder and longer and with fewer breaks than ever before. This had nothing to do with any physical change. I was just in the right place mentally.
I came home elated and wrote a big long blog post about motivation and the power of mind over matter and all sorts of stuff.
If you RSS this blog you probably read it.
If not, don't bother looking for it. I deleted it..

I feel like every muscle in my body hates me right now and i'm so tired i can barely concentrate as i type this.
Exhaustion is certainly a reason why i'm not training tonight.
My training partners couldn't make it tonight.I'd be training without a familiar face / safety net. That's part of it too.
I couldn't get a lift and it's dark and scary and i'd have to walk through a bad neighbourhood. That's part of it as well.
I've had a rubbish day at work where ideas weren't flowing and nothing went right. That's a factor certainly.
I received the documentary paperwork from NFM today and looked at filming schedules and the sheer weight of this daunting challenge hit me like an atom bomb.
That's a big part of it.
I'm fat and lazy and i have a comfy sofa and a whole box set of The Wire to watch and that is another (shameful) reason why i'm not in Benfield swinging heavy things.

It's all of these things. Mashed together into a big awful bag of excuses and get out clauses that has stopped me from training tonight.

Right now my coach is probably rolling his eyes and starting class without me.

I suck