INSPIRATION...

"The more you sweat in training, the less you will bleed in battle." - Motto of Navy Seals

What a crazy night.
First of all things went really well in my Kettlebell class. I managed a weird "get up thing" for the first time ever!
With my glowing understanding of Kettlebell terminology I'm sure that's no help to you whatsoever...but needless to say after nearly three months of trying and failing at something most people manage in their first couple of classes i really felt I've started this journey proper!
I'm proud of myself.
A little victory, but one nonetheless.

I then managed 100 two handed swings with a 12kg Kettlebell.
To anyone who trains that's probably pretty lame (Lynn warms up with a 16!), but to me..again it was a first..
This was entirely down to Phil my coach.
He's become more than a mentor and I'd count him as a good friend...but that sonofabitch knew exactly what to say and how to word the session brief to get the right response...
The key was the use of the word "challenge"...

For me, one big part of this journey has been the use of that word.
I know I'm not a tough guy. I know I'm lazy and i know I'm usually the first one to quit, but ever since Lynn "challenged" me to do this that word has had a special hold over me.
I'm not competitive so i will never bite like that. I am rubbish when it comes to target orientated training (I never weigh myself or count calories, i try not to gauge how far I've run etc etc..) but "challenging" me to do something is different.
It's like calling Marty McFly a chicken..

I pushed it tonight. To be brutally honest i pushed it till i barfed.
Embarrassing
But you know what...sitting here now...i feel great!

Andy

UP AND AT 'EM.....

“Speak softly and carry a big stick" - Theodore Roosevelt

In terms of the film: things are going great...
I spoke to Lynn last week and he has set me some new "homework" as well as finalising the final stages of the challenge.
I can't go into a lot of detail yet (it's still a little hush hush) but needless to say it's awesome and scary in equal measure...

I can reveal that as a part of my "warrior training" i am going to be spending quite a bit of time learning elements of the Filipino Martial Arts (often called Kali, Escrima or Arnis among others) particularly stick, sword and knife fighting techniques..
Kali is a battlefield art (in that it hasn't been completely "diluted" into a sport and that for the most part it is still taught as intended - to mess people up quickly and permanently). It is essentially an art devised to teach farmers how to fight. A militia art that is all function over form. An art that teaches core techniques very quickly that can be adapted to a variety of weapons. Very dangerous and very efficient.
Kali is also what i would describe as an "alive" art..one that is still evolving (to incorporate modern weapons and modern confrontations).
I have a little background knowledge of the art (as you can probably tell) and it's something i have a lot of respect for and I'm excited to learn more about.
I know it's an art Lynn has trained pretty intensively for many years and one he excels in.
Cool..

I also had a production meeting today with Steve and Maria (my producers from Vita Nova Films) which went really well...
Lots of exciting stuff on the cards though i'm sure there'll be many meetings ahead in order to get this film rollin'
Happy days

In terms of my training: I still suck
I had a really great (and intense) RKC training session on Saturday with Phil and the Killy mob, followed by a pretty respectable attempt at running on Sunday (i haven't ran in years)...
However yesterday my body decided to kick my ass...
I came down with a random (and pretty woeful) bout of man-flu. I couldn't leave the sofa let alone train...
I had a full on fever, barfing..all that lovely stuff...
Today i feel much better, suspiciously so, and I'm beginning to wonder if my body was just fighting back. All of this madness must be an epic shock to the system. My life these days seems to boil down to nothing other than training and recovery. I'm either sweating or I'm hurting...
Perhaps my body just wanted a break?

Anyway. No peace for the fat kid...i have another RKC Kettlebell session planned for tomorrow night and tonight i'm boxing with my awesome (and kick ass) girlfriend.

Goodnight

Andy

BOOKWORM...

"In China there was once a man who liked pictures of dragons, and his clothing and furnishings were all designed accordingly. His deep affection for dragons was brought to the attention of the dragon god, and one day a real dragon appeared before his window. It is said that he died of fright. He was probably a man who always spoke big words but acted differently when facing the real thing" - Hagakure

As i've mentioned before i'm something of a "bookish" nerd.
I read a lot and I find a lot of my inspiration and motivation comes from books, magazines, blogs, forums etc.
I've been fascinated with martial arts, history, martial cultures and particularly the history of Duelling for years.
I always did badly in History class in school becuase i was no good with dates and numbers. History to me came alive with people and stories. I'll never be a "knowledge" on any of this stuff because i never retain all the numbers...but i can tell you some awesome stories..

I chose the quote from the Hagakure above because i feel for a large part of my life it summed me up. I read about people doing amazing things and never did anything myself.
For a while i even went so far as to write for a UK Martial Arts magazine. Actually interviewing exciting people..while still doing nothing exciting myself!
But this isn't going to be one of those "he put down the book and picked up the sword" kind of journeys either.
I read a lot as part of my job, i read on my lunch break, i read when i get home at night and more often than not i read before going to bed to unwind.
But i also read before training...

I'm going to do a "bookworm" post every now and then. Tell you what i'm reading, what's inspiring me at the moment and why.
I don't know if it'll be particularly of interest to many people, but i think it's important to mention that it's a genuine part of my training.

So, i guess i'll kick this off with "By the Sword" by Richard Cohen.
By the Sword is a book i read pretty much constantly. I've read and re-read this book dozens of times. I'll finish other books and put them on the shelf but this book is always kicking around.
I bought Lynn a copy of this book as a thank you present for letting me and my crew hang out at Cold Steel.
Lynn has the largest collection of books i have ever seen outside a library. He's a true collector of anything and everything to do with martial arts, weapons and fighting techniques. This book was right up his street.
By the Sword chronicles a history of sword fighting. From Samurai to modern Olympic fencers...
It's by no means definitive, but it is exceptionally well written.
This isn't a review. I'm not going to go into epic detail about it. This isn't that sort of blog.
But this book is incredibly special to me.
It rocks.

HURDLES...

"Have you ever stayed up all night, worried that you've offended someone"? - Martin Kihn, A$$hole

I'm sitting here typing this from the comfort of my sofa....I am not in Benfield, and i am not lifting heavy things.

I suck

I'm doing my very best to step up to this challenge.
I'm attempting to find that warrior spirit that motivates people to push themselves out of their comfort zone and do something extraordinary.
I had a bit of a breakthrough on Monday night. I trained harder and longer and with fewer breaks than ever before. This had nothing to do with any physical change. I was just in the right place mentally.
I came home elated and wrote a big long blog post about motivation and the power of mind over matter and all sorts of stuff.
If you RSS this blog you probably read it.
If not, don't bother looking for it. I deleted it..

I feel like every muscle in my body hates me right now and i'm so tired i can barely concentrate as i type this.
Exhaustion is certainly a reason why i'm not training tonight.
My training partners couldn't make it tonight.I'd be training without a familiar face / safety net. That's part of it too.
I couldn't get a lift and it's dark and scary and i'd have to walk through a bad neighbourhood. That's part of it as well.
I've had a rubbish day at work where ideas weren't flowing and nothing went right. That's a factor certainly.
I received the documentary paperwork from NFM today and looked at filming schedules and the sheer weight of this daunting challenge hit me like an atom bomb.
That's a big part of it.
I'm fat and lazy and i have a comfy sofa and a whole box set of The Wire to watch and that is another (shameful) reason why i'm not in Benfield swinging heavy things.

It's all of these things. Mashed together into a big awful bag of excuses and get out clauses that has stopped me from training tonight.

Right now my coach is probably rolling his eyes and starting class without me.

I suck

JUST A TASTE...

"Heat and Pressure makes a Strong Sword" - Lynn C Thompson

Is it 'cos I'm fat? Promo from Katie Connon on Vimeo.

This is the 1 minute teaser-trailer that we put together for pitching the documentary concept.
Hopefully it gives you a little insight into what's in store for me.
I'm going to be facing up to an epic challenge and doing my best to embrace life as a "modern day warrior".
I don't quite know what that means or what it will entail, all will become clear as the months go on...but you can bet it'll be a wild ride...and it's gonna get crazy!

Many thanks to Phil Earley and the NKC, Dr Iain Brownlee and Ben Creighton for the blood, sweat and tears. Nick Light for filming it and Katie Connon for Editing.
The clip contains footage from Life on the Edge, footage filmed on location in Newcastle this year and shots and music from the Cold Steel Proof DVD (used with the kind permission of Lynn C Thompson)
You are all legends and I'm looking forward to going on this journey with you...

Andy

BACK IN THE SWING....

"The sword was to be more than a simple weapon, it had to be an answer to life's questions" - Eiji Yoshikowa, Musashi

I've been buzzing off the high that the documentary has been commissioned all week.
Incredibly excited. Inspired and enthused by the positive vibes from twitter (@isitcosimfat) and generally feeling the love.
People seem to be getting the right message from this (i hope)
It's not a film about violence. It's a film about confidence...and i hope that comes across.
I don't intend to end this journey by being some muscle-bound bag of dicks. I just want to find out if i can become a confident person, a person who is no longer afraid.

I started today with a pretty gruelling Kettlebell workout with Phil. At the moment I'm typing this from that warm glow you get immediately after training.
In an hour I'll feel like death warmed up.
Tomorrow I'll be in pieces...

I guess i need to get used to this.
It's what I've signed up for
this is it from now on in...

I hope you guys are with me for the ride...

FLAME ON...

"Sow an action and reap a habit, sow a habit and reap a character, sow a character and reap a destiny" - Old Duelling Quote

Picture taken April 2008 - Cold Steel Training Facility, California

DONKEY KONG...

"Dude...It's on...it's on like Donkey Kong" - Andy Smith talking to his Producer

FEBRUARY '10
TRAINING DIARY

I'm making a documentary...
Shit...
I'd better back up my brag

PITCHSLAP

"Live every week, like it's shark week" - Tracey Jordan, 30Rock

FEBRUARY '10
TRAINING DIARY
So this week i pitched my documentary...about half a dozen times!
I can't describe how terrifying it is to pitch something, especially something you care so much about. What i'm proposing is something that will fundamentally change my life for better or for worse.
I spent 13 hours on Monday talking passionately about this awesome challenge, this madcap experiment in terror to people who looked either bemused, incredulous or (joy of joys) genuinely fascinated.

When it comes to talking about Lynn and Cold Steel i can go all day.
I have been researching Lynn's company and Lynn's "Warrior Lifestyle" for over 5 years. I've visited the facilities, read the magazine articles, been to the conferences, watched the demos and bought the DVDs...i've sat on forums and hunting blogs and knife discussion boards for hours over the last few years.
Talking about Cold Steel is a walk in the park.

Talking about myself is proving a challenge...
I've learned to face the camera and to write this diary by turning all of this into a confessional.
I'm pouring my feelings out and sometimes it's weird. It's like i'm talking about someone else....
When i look back at the raw footage we captured from my training so far i can't see myself..it's not like looking in the mirror...Sometimes i don't recognise the fat nerd on screen...

Anyway, fingers crossed...three days till i find out...

NO PAIN....

"When ordinary people talk about aches and pains i just give them that look, the look that means "don't talk to me about pain, you don't even know where pain starts, brother" - Robert Twigger, Angry White Pjamas

JANUARY'10
TRAINING DIARY

Yup, i've wrecked my arm.
I can type (obviously) but i can't straighten it.
I cannot straigten my arm for love nor money!
A good job i sit at a desk for a living eh?
There is an exhaustion from Kettlebells which is hard to describe. Muscles ache for sure, but there is a profound all-over tiredness that i can't put into words.
I just want to sleep

PUNCH DRUNK

"Most people's appearance is poor because they do not look into the mirror well enough" - Hagakure

JANUARY '10
TRAINING DIARY

When i was 17 i was jumped and soundly kicked all over the street by a gang of guys in the city centre of my home town of Rugeley.
I remember distinctly trying to reason with my aggressors, trying to be the big funny fat guy who's every one's mate.
I also remember being paralysed with fear. Just standing there and watching a fist come sailing towards my face.
I remember allowing my attackers to pull me to my feet (so punch drunk i didn't realise what was going on) so they could beat me up some more.
They had gotten bored of kicking me you see, i was much more fun standing up.

I later learned that one of the men (someone i recognised as one of my school bullies. A hateful little toad who i hadn't even laid eyes on for over a decade) had been convicted of murder. He had stamped and kicked a man to death.
I feel sick just thinking about that.
It sounds perverse, but i guess i had a lucky escape.

This challenge has opened a lot of old wounds and created a fair few new ones too..

FIND THE FIRE

"Nothing is more discouraging for a soldier than to find, when he has dealt his adversary a mighty blow with his sword, that the blade twists or that the hilt comes off in his hand" - The Daily Telegraph, October 1895

JANUARY '10
TRAINING DIARY

I did a 20 min Kettlebell set before work this morning.
Guilt i guess. Whatever
I currently feel like puking my breakfast back up. We'll see how i feel later.
I really believe that up until now i have been training because of nothing more than fits and bursts of enthusiasm, not determination!
I have spent my entire adult life indulging myself. I eat what i want and exercise when i want.
I never stop eating until i am full. I never do anything unless it's fun.
I need to learn to get satisfaction from achievement. I need to accept that this may never be fun. It may never feel like an indulgence.
This is supposed to be a challenge. I need to learn a new way of thinking

DEEP BREATHS

"Look closey at your sorry-assed self and become afraid, very afraid" - Martin Kihn, A$$hole

JANUARY '10
TRAINING DIARY

Random insults from kids in the street today.
"Hit the gym fat ass"
Furious and embarrassed
Fuck

MORE PUNISHMENT

"It turns out that boxing gyms are not the right place to look for assholes" - Martin Kihn, A$$hole

DECEMBER '09
Kettlebells was going well...sort of..
I was crappy and inconsistent and frequently had to run out of the class to puke but at least i was training.
So what was next?
Boxing
Oh, boy..Boxing

Lynn said to me "you need to learn to box, to be pressured, to be able to pick up angles of attack, to cover up and learn to ride with the punches"
That was easy for him to say. I'd seen Lynn boxing. He adopted an entirely devastating blend of Panantukan (Filipino dirty boxing), western boxing and Japanese shoot fighting techniques as taught to him by the legendary Ron Balicki.
There was no point having a stand up fight with Lynn, whatever you threw at him would just get broken.

I enlisted the help of an old friend. A Doctor actually. A doctor who trains cage fighters.
Dr Iain Brownlee (pictured)is one of my closest buddies. We share a common interest in crappy horror movies and takeaway curries that had enjoyably taken up a lot of my Friday nights over the years. But while i nommed all the curries and then went back to a desk job, Iain was a full on, kick ass fight coach.
Iain had a cutting sense of humour. He once jokingly compared me to Peter Griffon (of Family Guy fame) and i had to admit, looking in the mirror, he wasn't far wrong.
Apart from the bad jokes and the cheeky digs Iain was a great coach. He was patient, intelligent and (like Phil my Kettlebell coach) all about the technique.
I was going to learn boxing RIGHT. No throwing me in at the deep end. A great deal of preparation in the fundamental and the groundwork. I was to learn covering, head movement and footwork first. Get used to being hit, defending intelligently and then retaliating.
Awesome, the noble art of defense...

SO WHAT'S IN STORE FOR ME?

"Take three months to prepare your machines" - Sun Tsu, The Art of War

NOVEMBER '09
I spent an hour on the phone talking to Lynn about what i should do.
His first homework assignment was "learn kettlebells"

One quick wikipedia search later told me:
The kettlebell or girya (Russian: гиря) is a cast iron weight looking somewhat like a cannonball with a handle.
Unlike traditional dumbbells, the kettlebell's center of mass is extended beyond the hand. This allows for swing movements not possible with traditional dumbbells. Because more muscle groups are utilized in the swinging and movement of a kettlebell than during the lifting of dumbbells, a kettlebell workout is said to be more effective, and yields better results in less time.

The more i read about Kettlebells the more i could see Lynn's reasoning.
This challenge wasn't to get super buff and to be Mr Body Beautiful, far from it...but i did need to be strong. Kettlebells make really strong people.
I was excited. In my head this was like an awesome Rocky Montage...

I got in touch with Phil Earley (pictured above), a highly respected RKC and IKFF accredited Kettlebell coach who taught in my city.
Phil is a cool bloke, quiet, softly spoken but highly enthusiastic. Phil had trained Natalie Smith, a Geordie girl who had starred in BBC3's Last Woman Standing (someone who would become a good friend and a constant source of encouragement over the next few months).
Phil taught "Hardstyle" kettlebell techniques, focusing on technique, form and effort. You would work damn hard, but you would do it correctly.
No crappy lifts, no half-assed squats, but also no injuries, no accidents and no mistakes.

Phil's classes were full of friendly people of every shape and size imaginable, but they all had one thing in common..they were all tough!
Very quickly every man and woman in that hall became my role models.
Phil gave me lots of attention, helped me with my bruised ego and lack of confidence and encouraged me to dig deep and train hard.
I found kettlebells to be the toughest, most demanding physical exercise I've ever done in my life.
That first night i found i could barely sleep for the pain in my abs and thighs..the next day...well, let's just say i hurt...

IWA 2009

(left to right) Ron Balicki, Lynn C Thompson, Andy Talbot Smith
This photo was taken a couple of hours before Lynn issued me with the challenge.

THE STORY SO FAR

"Be nice, until it's time not to be nice" - Dalton, Roadhouse

Almost a year ago to the day I was sat in a hotel lobby in Nuremberg,Germany with Lynn C Thompson, the Founder and President of Cold Steel Inc when he issued me a challenge.

Lynn is truly a self made man.
A man who embraced what he calls a "Warrior Lifestyle".
Training daily with the world's greatest exponents of a myriad of martial arts, highly proficient with every weapon you can imagine (from knives and swords to spears, guns and rifles), lifting weights...Lynn has given his life to the sometimes controversial pursuit of martial excellence.
Supremely confident, loud, outspoken and proud he is an intimidating figure.
Yet Lynn is genuinely a nice guy.
His favourite quote (which i feel sums up his "warrior lifestyle" perfectly) is from the Patrick Swayze movie Roadhouse.
"Be nice, until it's time not to be nice"

I had made a short film (entitled Life on the Edge)about Lynn and his warrior ethos the year before. I had great plans for making an epic documentary following Lynn as he shot guns, trained in martial arts and did all the things that seemed so exciting and crazy to a sheltered nerd from the UK.
I enjoyed being behind the camera, watching this madcap action from behind the scenes and living out schoolboy fantasies of kicking ass and shooting guns vicariously through Lynn's exploits.
So it came as a complete shock to me, sitting in that hotel bar, when Lynn threw down the gauntlet and challenged me to become a warrior!

I have issues with violence. Bullied since a small child for being overweight, a victim of violent crime and possessing "one of those faces" that seems to land me into more trouble than i care for. I'm not one for fisticuffs.
I am 31, heavily overweight, insecure, neurotic and something of a geek.
Hardly the stuff of champions, I'm sure you'll agree...
I have some experience with martial arts (a trained for several years in Filipino Martial Arts before the desk job and the bacon sandwiches took their toll), but i am generally bookish, slovenly and a poster child for the Internet and pizza generation.

Lynn would be the first to tell you he is not a skinny guy. He's often ridiculed by youtube hecklers who refuse to see past his belly and look at the skills he displays.
Yet none of this seems to bother him. He isn't held back by his size.
He challenged me to stop hiding behind my own stereotype, to man up and face all the fears that have held me back, and to try and live as he does, as a modern day warrior.

It took me a few months to pluck up the nerve to take him up on this offer, but I'm going to go for it. I don't know what's in store for me..but I'm sure it'll be entertaining.

I'm inviting you guys to join me for the ride

Andy